Men`s Divorce Dating

Divorce rates are at an all-time high. Many couples are going through the pain of a dysfunctional marriage. You also have to take into account the number of divorces that are stopped before they get too far. You’re not alone in experiencing the pain of divorce.

I often get guys asking me “How can I pull it back from disaster?” or “How do I get the marriage back to love and happiness?” While every divorce has different people, values and circumstances, there are some core errors that people often to make when trying to salvage a marriage.

I want to help you stop these mistakes and create positive outcomes instead.

Here are some common relationship mistakes that can really accelerate a divorce, and some ideas you can use to change habits and eliminate some of the pain of divorce.

Reassurance - “I’ll change. I swear!”

Have you ever resorted to this kind of desperation? Has anyone used it on you before? Did you honestly believe your wife or girlfriend when she said this? I didn’t think so, even if they really mean it, your marriage is probably in so much trouble that this’ll sound insincere. It’ll also sound weak, and build no confidence in your wife. Even if it’s what you THINK she wants to hear. What she says and is not always what she means or what she wants to hear. At this point, it’s too late to salvage a marriage. Last minute tactics like this will not work …

So what works? How can you reassure her? There really isn’t much you can say. So why say anything? That is right; don’t try to reassure her. Actions speak louder than words. Show strength and positivity in your dealings with your wife, and do what needs to be done without talking about your intentions.

Tread lightly and carry a big stick.

Emotional blackmail - “I love you so much!”

Yea, I know you’re sincere about this. But it’s such an obvious fall back. She’ll feel pressured, and emotionally blackmailed. Especially if she does love you and is just hiding it, it’ll just push her farther away because she’ll feel like you’re targeting her emotional soft-spot. And that’ll just make things worse. “I love you” is one of the most powerful sentences in any language. But power applied in the wrong way can cause disasters. Especially in a fragile relationship.

So can you tell them how you feel? While you may feel the urge to blurt “I love you”, it’ll often it’s best NOT to use it while you’re both in such a delicate circumstance. Save that for better times and high points, .when you can both grasp the words with a clear head.

Arguing – “But you promised …”

Using logic or guilt to change your wife’s mind is the surest way NOT to salvage a marriage. Being defensive and hypocritical is counter-productive. The more you argue the more she’ll lock up. If you’re negative, she’ll do the same. Needing to win is counter-productive. Trying to force unnatural change can be like digging your way out of a hole.

So how can you salvage a marriage without discussion and arguments? Once again, don’t do it! Getting drawn into an argument is one of the biggest relationship mistakes you can make at this point. Arguments completely mess up a fragile situation.

Don’t solve the problem? It doesn’t make sense, right? Fix something by not fixing it? But it works! Don’t defend yourself … she’ll be reluctant to come after you if you just hand over the victory. In this case, you have nothing to gain by winning.

This dissolves the hostility. The root cause of the problem can only be addressed once the hostility and defensiveness and urge to WIN is taken away. That’s the only time when a solution will work itself out ..

That’s right, the problem solves itself. You don’t need to fix it; both of you will start to change to solve the problems. As opposed to before, where you would both be too stubborn and unwilling to budge. As corny as it sounds, love really is the answer. But you’ve both got to put your egos aside first.

These are just a few ideas to avoid the pain of divorce. Of course every situation is different and your case may require a slightly different approach. But I’m hopeful that this will help many of you avoid common relationship mistakes.

Good luck!

Tags: salvage a marriage, relationship mistakes, pain of divorce

I see a lot of great guys with lots to offer to a future wife. Yet, they have no luck when it comes to getting women to talk to them, let alone go date them? What they lack is a clear roadmap on how to understand women and regain their confidence after divorce.

These days, girls are pretty hard to impress. Men often feel overwhelmed. As a single man trying to attract a future wife, there are a few things you can do to gain an edge.

It’s all about being more confident. Nothing will lure your future wife more than self-confidence. Honestly. Women want a strong man. Someone who’s sure self-assured and acts that way. I’m not talking about being mean or arrogant, I mean self confident. If you’re feeling worthless, you’ll give off a vibe with your body language, and that’s NOT a feature that turns women on.

Think about it. There’s a girl sitting alone at the end of the bar who isn’t smiling, won’t make eye contact and has nothing to say. Is this someone you want to be with? Of course not. But, that same woman… If she’s smiling, looking around and begins a conversation with you when you approach. Is this someone you’d want to know better? The same is true for men.

Body language speaks louder then words. You need to exude self confidence if you want to attract women. Being more confident will create the instant attraction that will hook your future wife.

There is also something to be said about “faking till you make it”. Ever meet someone who always seems to get hot girls? Keep an eye on him next time you go out. How is he acting differently than you? Does he have any traits that are easily copied? I’m not talking about pick-up lines. I mean more subtle thing, like posture. How does he stand? How does he talk to women he approaches? Try to model yourself after someone who’s successful. This is a sure way to regain your confidence after divorce, and to become more successful yourself.

Humor is also great for attracting women. But this can be a delicate operation. If you come off as a clown, you’ll be turning women off. If you can somehow find this balance, you’ll be successful. Most women yearn for a man who can make her laugh. For some, it can be the first thing that attracts them.

Simply being more confident and improving your sense of humor will yield results quickly. If you can manage to maintain your confidence after divorce, you’ll find your future wife in no time.

Tags: confidence after divorce, being more confident, future wife

For divorced men, dating can be tricky

There are a lot of books out there on “How to Attract Hot Babes” But I believe that finding the perfect woman is simple! What’s hard is figuring out what your definition of the perfect woman is, so you’ll know what qualities to look for in the first place! Especially if you’ve just started dating after divorce. That’s why I’ve developed a step by step tutorial for divorced men to attract their dream lover:

Step 1: Put together a list of the qualities you want in an ideal girlfriend. Split this list into four categories:

Physical, Mental, Emotional and Spiritual.

Write down how your future girlfriend will rate in each one of these criteria. Make sure to keep this list with you in your wallet for about a week or so. It’s a funny thing… writing seems to transform your inner thoughts, feelings, and desires about your ideal girlfriend into concrete, physical reality. This is the first step you’ll have to take in order to get this woman into your life.

Step 2: Place your final copy of this list onto a nicely decorated background - and have it laminated. Trust me. One day, you’ll be showing it to your future girlfriend, once you realize they’ve appeared in your life. Just make sure to keep it somewhere nobody else can see it, because you’ll only want to share it between yourself and your dream girl.

Step 3: But before you hide your nicely laminated expression of love, take a good look in the mirror and use your list as a reference. Do you possess all of the qualities you desire in this other person?

Let me give you an example to show you what I mean. When you go fishing, you’ll generally use a worm for bait. But you wouldn’t use worms for a mouse trap, would you? If you wanted to catch a mouse, you’d use cheese! The same thing applies for getting your perfect girlfriend. First, you must get the right bait. And that means, becoming the “perfect” man that will attract the “perfect” woman. If you want a girlfriend who’s loving, give more love to others around you. If you want someone with a great body, go join a gym. If you want someone who’s generous, give to charity.

Step Four: Set aside a moment of silence every day to meditate. Thank your subconscious mind for your ideal woman being attracted to you. Know in your heart that all these things you’re doing are working, and that it will eventually fall into place for you at the right time. While you are at it, imagine vividly in your mind that you’re telling your ideal woman how much you love her, and how you are excited about meeting them soon. Make it as vivid as possible. Don’t worry about how long it takes. Your future girlfriend may have to go through certain experiences before she’s ready to meet with you.

Your subconscious mind will pick up on the energy you are sending out, and assume your perfect woman is already a in your life. Also, you’ll suddenly find yourself taking appropriate actions (without consciously knowing) to make your wishes become reality. For example, you might never be a party person - and a co-worker might invite you to a party. Your normal reaction would be to say no. But for some odd reason, your gut will tell you to go. And when you get there, who is the attractive woman sitting at a couch alone - making suggestive eye contact with you?

Your subconscious mind will take over and lead you into situations like these without your knowing! All you have to do is meditate and forget about it.

Step 5: Make the effort to forgive everyone who’s hurt you in your past, including yourself. Negative energy has a way of preventing positive change from happening in your life. The struggle inside your mind will be a constant burden. For your own sake, let go of the past so you can focus exclusively on beautiful, wonderful and positive things in your life. What you think about becomes reality, so be very careful and monitor your thoughts.

Your mind is the most powerful tool you’ll ever own, average person only uses about 3% of their brain capacity at any given time. There are mysteries about the human brain that will never be solved. But the power of your mind is quite real. Harness the power of this tool to focus on manifestation, rather than destruction. And just remember, you can have anything you want, as long as you keep your mind focused. The same is true for attracting your ideal woman. I do this all the time to attract the women I want into my life.

Still skeptcal? Just try this out for 2 months and see for yourself.

Tags: Dating After Divorce, Divorce Dating, Divorced Men

Here’s a great example of confident perseverance when approaching women. Absolutely brilliant. It’s from “Scent of a Woman”. Notice how he pushes through the rejection while maintaining a fun, playful mood.

And there isn’t much thought required to do this. He just takes all of her excuses, exaggerates them, then throws them back. (This is an old improv technique) He demonstrates control, without being controlling. He just maintains a nice, happy, slightly competitive vibe throughout the entire interaction.

Enjoy

Any single father who wants to find a match both inside and out knows how hard the process can be! Single fathers are busy with work and supporting their families, and caring taking care for kids on the weekends can eliminate any “personal time”. Many single fathers might want to find true love, but can’t imagine making it out in the dating scene again. I’ve put together these tips to make your shot at love much easier:   

Never feel like you’re alone-you’re among nearly 15 million single individuals bringing up children.

Despite any reservations you may have, dating is ok at any age!   

Have a talk with your kids if you’re going to be bringing any new girls home. Making them feel more comfortable will prevent any awkwardness or jealous feelings.

Because you have kids now, you’re going to have to keep an eye out. Trust your instincts and avoid anyone who gives you any sketchy vibes. Chances are, if your gut says no, this woman probably isn’t right for you or your family.    

Online dating services can be effective. Be honest about what you expect, and about your family situation. Your future girlfriend will accept and respect your situation if you have a confident attitude about your life.    

If a woman is uncomfortable about your having kids, don’t try to change their mind. They need to accept the total package or you’re setting yourself up for future problems.    

For single fathers, online dating is an extremely popular way to meet other single moms. When using a dating site, remember to keep your profile current and straight-to-the-point. This way, you’ll attract someone who accepts you for who you are!

I hope these dating tips were helpful.

 Tags: Dating Tips for Single Fathers, Dating Tips, Single Fathers, Online Dating for Single Fathers, Single Fathers Dating